Jump out of the car, knowing it's later than you'd like to believe.
Walk drunkenly towards the door.
Stumble.
Compose.
Open door, quietly, slip in the smallest crack imaginable.
Sober up, compose yourself.
Shuffle through house. Paying attention to the squeaks.
Cringe at the thought of waking them up.
Compose youself.
Stride on.
Shuffle.
Open door. It squeaks. Cringe.
Look around, wide eyes.
Slip in the smallest crack imaginable.
Close door.
Stand, wait. Listen.
Breath.
Listen. Hear a shuffle.Reconsider flipping on the light.
Hear a door. Sober up, sober up, sober up.
Pray. Sadly.
Stand. Quietly use super-sound to determine where the shuffle is headed.
Other way.
Disaster averted.
Reflect on the mistakes made. Regret that last shot of Jack.
Feel it coming up. Push it back down esophagus.
Pull out dying phone.
Text driver of the car you got out of.
"I'm safe. Thanks for a great night :)"
Finally move.
Tear clothes off.
Smell them.
Cringe at the smell of sex and beer.
Make note to wash them before someone else does.
Put on the comforts of home; clean pajamas.
Pull back the covers.
Look at clock. 4:12 AM.
Close eyes momentarily to reflect.
Pass. Out. Unexpectedly.
Wake up.
9:26 AM.
Go to work.
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